Engineeringstudentsaresupposedtobeexamplesofpracticalityandrationality,butwhenitcomestomycollegeeducationIamanidealistandafool.InhighschoolIwantedtobeanelectricalengineerand,ofcourse,anysensiblestudentwithmyaimswouldhavechosenacollegewithalargeengineeringdepartment,famousreputationandlotsofgoodlabsandresearchequipment.Butthat‘snotwhatIdid.
Ichosetostudyengineeringatasmallliberal-arts(文科)universitythatdoesn‘tevenofferamajorinelectricalengineering.Obviously,thiswasnotapracticalchoice;Icamehereformorenoblereasons.Iwantedabroadeducationthatwouldprovidemewithflexibilityandavaluesystemtoguidemeinmycareer.Iwantedtoopenmyeyesandexpandmyvisionbyinteractingwithpeoplewhoweren’tstudyingscienceorengineering.Myparents,teachersandotheradultspraisedmeforsuchasensiblechoice.TheytoldmeIwaswiseandmaturebeyondmy18years,andIbelievedthem.
IheadedofftocollegesureIwasgoingtohaveanadvantageoverthosestudentswhowenttobigengineering“factories”wheretheydidn‘tcareifyouhavevaluesorwereflexible.Iwasgoingtobeacompleteengineer:technicalgeniusandsensitivehumanist(人文学者)allinone.
NowI‘mnotsosure.Somewherealongthewaymynobleidealscrashedintoreality,asallnobleidealseventuallydo.Afterthreeyearsofstrugglingtobalancemath,physicsandengineeringcourseswithliberal-artscourses,Ihavelearnedtherearereasonswhyfewengineeringstudentstrytoreconcile(协调)engineeringwithliberal-artscoursesincollege.
Therealitythathasblockedmypathtobecomethetypicalsuccessfulstudentisthatengineeringandtheliberalartssimplydon’tmixaseasilyasIassumedinhighschool.Individuallytheyshapeapersoninverydifferentways;togethertheythreatentoconfuse.Thestruggletoreconcilethetwofieldsofstudyisdifficult.
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