秦文君，著名儿童文学作家，1954 年生于上海，现为中国作家协会全国委员会委员，上海作家协会副主席，中国福利会出版社总编辑。
著有长篇小说《男生贾里》、《女孩贾梅》、《小鬼鲁智胜》、《小丫林晓梅》、《花彩少女的事儿》等；有的作品被译介到海外，以英文、德文、日文等文字出版；《男生贾里》、《宝贝当家》、《家有小丑》、《调皮的日子》等十余部小说还被改编成影视作品播映。
作品曾先后获中宣部"五个一工程"奖、全国优秀少儿读物一等奖、中国作家协会全国优秀儿童文学奖、中华儿童文学奖、儿童文学园丁奖、上海文学艺术优秀成果奖、文化部全国"蒲公英"少儿读物金奖、中国台湾杨唤儿童文学奖、中国台湾九歌文学奖等四十多种奖项。
秦文君于2002年10月获得国际安徒生文学奖提名奖。
Mom: There are fifteen people in this house and you're the only one who has to make trouble.
Kevin: I'm the only one who is really getting dumped on.
Mom: You are the only one acting up. Now get upstairs.
Kevin: I am upstairs, dummy! The third floor?
Kevin: It's scary up there.
Mom: Don't be silly, Fuller will be in for a while.
Kevin: I don't want to sleep with Fuller. You know about him. He wets the bed. He’ll pee all over me. I know it.
Mom: Fine, we'll put him somewhere else.
Mom: It's too late. Get upstairs.
Kevin: Everyone in this family hates me!
Mom: Then maybe you should ask Santa for a new family.
Kevin: I don't want a new family. I don't want any family. Families suck!
Mom: Just stay up there. I don't want to see you again for the rest of the night.
Kevin: I don't want to see you for the rest of my whole life. I don't want to see anybody else either.
Mom: I hope you don't mean that. You'd feel pretty sad if you woke up tomorrow morning and you didn't have a family.
Mom: Then say it again. Maybe it'll happen.
Kevin: I hope I never see any of you jerks again!
Buzz: I wouldn't let you sleep in my room... if you were growing on my ass.
Marv: There! What are we gonna do with him, Harry?
Harry: We'll do exactly what he did to us: we're gonna burn his head with a blowtorch.
Marv: And smash his face with an iron!
Harry: I like to slap him right in the face with a paint can.
Marv: And shove a nail through his foot!
Harry: First off, I'm gonna bite off his every little fingers one at a time.
(Just then, Marley knocks Harry and Marv with his shovel)
Kate: Kevin, get upstairs right now.
Jeff: Kevin, you're such a disease.
Kate: Say good night, Kevin.
Kevin: "Good night, Kevin."
Kate: PETER! (They jump out of bed)
Kate and Peter: (shouting) We slept in!
Kevin: Buzz! I'm going through all your private stuff! You better come out and pound me!
Kevin: Guys, I'm eating junk and watching rubbish! You better come out and stop me!
Harry: (seeing Marv laugh) What's so funny? What's so funny? What are you laughing at? (Marv covers his mouth) You did it again, didn't you? You left the water running, didn't you? What's wrong with you? Why'd you do that? I told you not to do it.
Marv: Harry, it's our calling card.
巴兹：我不会让你们在我的房间睡觉...如果你挨着我的屁股。
哈利：首先，我要去咬掉他的小手指。（这时，凯文和马弗与哈利敲门）
凯文：巴兹！我会一直用你所有的东西！你最好出来揍我！
凯文：大家好，我吃垃圾，看垃圾！你最好出来制止我！
哈利：（看凯文笑）这有什么好笑？32313133353236313431303231363533e58685e5aeb931333337373536这有什么好笑？你笑什么？ （凯文包括他的嘴）你再次做到了，不是吗？你洗完澡了吗？有什么问题吗？为什么你这样做？我告诉你不要去做。
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