2012年12月大学英语四级写作方法：变化才是真思维导图

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2023-03-17

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2012年12

　　2012年12月大学英语四级写作方法：语态的隐含意义　　Stylish English has… 　　Variety Brevity is not always a virtue 　　变化才是真　　简短未必是美德　　许多人将简洁与简短混为一

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2012年12月大学英语四级写作方法：语态的隐含意义

StylishEnglishhas…

VarietyBrevityisnotalwaysavirtue

变化才是真

简短未必是美德

许多人将简洁与简短混为一谈，其实二有很大区别。简洁的主旨是用尽量少的词汇讲述整个故事，简短的主旨则是为保持文章篇幅短小，精心撰写或随意删除文中的某些词语或章节。

简洁并不意味着总写短句子。事实上，如果句式缺乏变化，文章就会显得支离破碎，缺少联系，让人觉得写作技巧贫乏。句式的变化能令文章协调而流畅，会让读者感觉到作者对主题把握得游刃有余。虽然短句没什么语法错误，但用得太多会使本应合在一起的意思分离开来。

记住：不要使用一串串短的、支离破碎的句子。要理清自己的思路，尽量使句子长度有所变化。

例:

Before:TheArtofStrategywaswrittenbySunTzu.Itisafifty-six-hundred-wordChineseclassicalwork.Thewriterputforthasetofprinciplesinaverytightlycompressedmanner.Theydealwithhowtodefeatoppositionsandwinbattles.

这种表达的问题在于：

(1)简单的“主语+谓语”结构太多;

(2)"written"和"writer","TheArtofStrategy"和"It"，"setofprinciples"和"they"为重复用语;

(3)读起来很单调。

After：Inhisfifty-six-hundredwordclassic,TheArtofStrategy,SunTzuputforthatightlycompressedsetofprinciplesforachievingtriumphoveropposition.

介词结构+同位语+主语+谓语的形式比较好，因为将"SunTzu"放到了最重要成分-主语的位置，其他成分按逻辑排序居次要地位。整个句子很流畅。

再看下面各例

Choppy:Ofcourse,theweaponsatSunTzu’stimewerequiteprimitive.Thearmieswereverylarge.TheywerenearlyaslargeasthoseinWorldWarTwo.ThedevastationandhumansufferingswerejustasprofoundasinWorldWarTwo.

Better:ComparedwithWorldWarTwo,theweaponsatSunTzu’stimewerequiteprimitive,butthearmieswerenearlyaslargeandthedevastationandhumansufferingjustasprofound.

Choppy:Proverbsareshortsayings.Theyaredrawnfromlongexperience.

Better:Proverbsareshortsayingsdrawnfromlongexperience.

Choppy:Peoplechangeandplaceschangeaswell.Jenniferfeltthisstrongly.Shehadbeenawayforelevenyears.

Better:Onreturningafteraneleven-yearabsence,Jenniferhadastrongfeelingofhowpeopleandplaceschange.

Choppy:Beijingstreetsarecrowdedwithtaxis,companycarsandprivatevehiclesownedbythenewlyaffluent.Thenumberhasbeenrisingrapidlyinthelastfewyears.Thelateststatisticsshowtherearenow1.2millionvehiclesinBeijingalone.

Better:Taxis,companycarsandprivatevehiclesownedbythenewlyaffluenthavecrammedBeijingstreetsinrisingnumbersinthelastfewyears-1.2millionvehiclesatlastcount.

Choppy:MobyDickisabook.Itisalongbook.Itisaboutawhale.AmannamedAhabtriestokillit.HermanMelvillewroteit.

Better:HermanMelvillewrotealongbookcalledMobyDick.Itisthestoryofastruggleofamanagainstawhale.

Choppy:Thousandsofbuildingsmetthesamefate.Thisaloneisnowbeingpreserved.Itmarksthecenterofthenuclearexplosion.Itisbeingpreservedasasymbol.ItsymbolizesourwishthattherebenomoreHiroshimas.

Better:Ofthethousandsofbuildingsthatmetthesamefate,thisalone,markingthecenterofthenuclearexplosion,isnowbeingpreservedtosymbolizeourwishthattherebenomoreHiroshimas.

Choppy:Ihavealwayshadadream.Mydreamhasbeentobeafamouswriter.Everyonewouldreadmybooks.Iwouldbecomeverywealthy.

Better:Ihavealwaysdreamedofbeingawealthy,famouswriter,readbyeveryone.

Choppy:Thisisawreck.ItwasformerlythestatelyImperialGarden.Itispreserveddeliberatelyasareminderandsymbol.

Better:Thiswreck,formerlythestatelyImperialGarden,ispreserveddeliberatelyasareminderandsymbol.

北京鲁迅博物馆思维导图